What it’s like to live with depression and anxiety

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So, my depression and anxiety have been rearing their ugly heads and since I don’t really have anyone to talk to about it, I thought I would write a blog! Here is a conversation-style dialogue between myself and depression/anxiety.

Me: I want to get healthy and lose weight!

Depression: Why bother?

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Me: I want to have more friends.

Anxiety: I don’t want to be around people.

Me: Yay for me, I got a job promotion!

Depression/Anxiety: You aren’t smart enough. Look at all the mistakes you have made. You should give up!

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Me: Sometimes I wish I wasn’t single.

Depression: You’re too fat to be in a relationship.

Me: I need to make some positive changes in my life.

Depression/Anxiety: It’s been a rough day. We wouldn’t make any changes right now. Better to stay where it’s comfortable.

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Me: I’m tired of struggling, I want a better life.

Depression: It’s always going to be this way.

Me: I want to write a book!

Anxiety: You’re not good enough. Do you know how impossible it is to be a successful writer?! No one will read it.

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Me: I really need to go to the store and get groceries.

Anxiety: It’s so busy today. Best to wait until it’s not so crowded.

 

Maybe you can relate to some of these statements.

  1. In my mind, I am kind and wish the best for everyone. What comes out is cranky and negative.
  2. Mornings are rough and it’s hard for me to fall asleep because of a restless mind.
  3. If I am in a store and an aisle is crowded, I will find another aisle to avoid having to maneuver through people.
  4. I often under-perform because I’m afraid (anxious) of failure or being a disappointment to others.
  5. I worry a lot and usually expect the worst case scenario.
  6. I often feel like a failure as a parent and person in general because it’s so hard to get motivated to do anything.
  7. I feel like a horrible person whenever I hear about all the things other people are doing that I have no interest in.
  8. I have to commute to work and it is a big source of stress.

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Depression and anxiety are no fun. At least I can “function” with it. For others, it can be crippling and unmanageable. If you have depression/anxiety, you are not alone. Don’t give up!

Related topics:

Holiday Depression – Hating the Holidays

Cheap Bookish Ways to Beat Depression

 

 

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